Hey! Stop Making Me Fart Dairy Queen!!! Songtext

von Rage Against The Homeless

Hey, stop making me fart Dairy Queen. You always make me fart Dairy Queen. The Queen of the diaries, you're like a fairy. Queen of the Dairy Queen. I got a Blizzard from your store; you make me fart for an hour or more. They reek like shit, that's half of what they're made of. I don't even know what the other half is, I guess its corn!
I like M&M's and I like Pepsi, put 'em together and what do you see? You see visible farts hanging in the air staginfing the entire room. Is staginfing even a word? I don't think it is. But for the intents and purposes of the song I hope it is because it's such a masterful word! Staginfing, staginfing! Stop making me fart Dairy Queen. Why can't I dance mommy? Dance at Dairy Queen. The homeless and the retards too, I'm gonna recap every song just for you. Unless you're Jewish, in which case I hate you (And the brother I never had!). Very true... Very true.....
Hey, stop making me fart Dairy Queen. Why, do you make me fart Dairy Queen? Perhaps its because I go to the Mini-Mart and get 64 oz. of Pepsi mixed with 7-Up so its still a Pepsi product. Well, you know what? I don't even know if you make me fart, or I just like to shit myself over at Jonathan's house!
Maybe it's the singing... the singing! The singing and the dancing that mommy won't let me do brings out the natural juices the natural juices take the form of gasses, and they come out and they reek! And I enjoy them because they're delicious an if I could I'd fart in my mouth! And it would be delicious and I would keep my farts in jars and I'd go to Dairy Queen every day! And I would get Blizzards and I'd be fat as Jacob and I would eat all the Dairy Queen Blizzards and drink all the Pepsi in the world and I would have the nastiest farts and I would be God!!! They would make me King of the Retards! And I would die, I'd go to heaven where I would meet God. And God would say to me, "My child, my lamb, the lamb of God, why did you go to Dairy Queen? Why did you eat so fuckin' much? Its a sin you stupid bitch." And I would say, "God, worry not my savior, for I hate you, and I do not believe that gluttony is a sin because I took great pleasure from crapping at a constant rate." Did we mention that we're Americans? That's right, we're Americans. That means we don't go hungry, because we have Dairy Queen...
Hey, Dairy Queen, stop makin' me fart every day, if ya know what I mean. I crap my pants and it smells like shit. I can't go to school anymore because there's fuckin' stink lines drawn over my head, all the children, that's what they said. They said, "Mitch is the smelliest mother fucker in all the town! So is Jonathan, his guitar playin' bizzach!"
That's why, when I went up to heaven, for the second time, and spoke to God again. He said, "My child, lamb of God, my eternal savior of the mortal world. What brings ye upon my heavenly gates?" And I said, "It is I, Mitch Desgrosellier, with my army of retards to storm the gates of heaven." You know why? Why??? Why won't Dairy Queen stop making me fart every night?
*Idle Banter*
Hey, Dairy Queen, stop makin' me fart you high calorie ass cream making machine, I'm gonna click you you mother fuckin' fucker. I hate you, I hate you. I hope you hate me as much as I hate you cuz I can't stop fartin' because of you. Dairy Queen hey stop makin' me fart Dairy Queen Dairy Queen ding diggidy ding dong d' ding dong Dairy Queen stop makin' me fart, yo!