Gospel According to Britney Lyrics

In the beginning,
When there was nothing,
God said "Let there be rock",
Then he changed his mind and came up with me.

Bowp! Bow bow bowp!

Then there was Moses,
Turning sticks into snakes.
Man, the drugs were good back then,
If you burn enough bush you could part the Red Sea.

Bowp! Bow bow bowp!

God said, "Let there be light,
Let there be a stage.
Wall-to-wall midriffs and ambiguous breast size".
You have the right,
If you're underage you'll understand what this recording is reporting,
It's the Gospel... According to Me.

Then all this other stuff happened.
I'm not clear on the facts -
Some sort of exodus,
Must be a road trip with a coming of age.

David and Goliath,
Had some sort of romance, I think.
In Soddom and Gomorrah,
And they were turned into pillars of the community.

Bowp! Bow bow bowp!

God said, "Let there be light,
Let there be a stage.
Wall-to-wall midriffs and ambiguous breast size".
You have the right,
If you're underage you'll understand what this recording is reporting,
It's the Gospel According to Me.

Okay, time for the Latin stuff!

Arrriba!
(trumpet noises)

According to me...
Everybody wore rags but they didn't make it look good like I do.
According to me...
Everybody was a virgin but they didn't make it look good like I do.
According to me...
You didn't need to raise from the dead if you had decent management like I do.
According to me...
According to me...

God said, "Let there be light,
Let there be a stage.
Wall-to-wall midriffs and ambiguous breast size".
You have the right,
If you're underage you'll understand what this recording is reporting,
It's the Gospel... aaaaaaccording to Me.