Beep Lyrics

Muppet #1 (sung): If it says one, then I go beep.
If it says two, then I go beep beep.
If it says three, then I go beep beep beep.
And that's the way it's done.

Muppet #2 (spoken): Yeah, but what if it says four?

Muppet #1 (sung): I go beep beep beep beep, nothing more.

Muppet #2 (spoken): But what if it says more than four?

Muppet #1 (sung really fast): Then I go Beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep-
(into incomprehension, and screen fills up with circles)

Muppet #2 (spoken): Like what if it says forty-six?

Muppet #1 (sung really fast again): Then I go Beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep-
(into more incomprehension, and the screen fills up with forty-six circles)
(sung at normal speed)
Now, I used to get confused about my numbers,
Whether it was three or one or four or two.
But now I find my numbers very easy,
'Cause this is what I do ...
If it says one, then I go beep.
If it says two, then I go beep beep.
If it says three, then I go beep beep beep.
And that's the way it's done.

Muppet #2 (spoken): Yeah, but what if it says four?

Muppet #1 (sung): I go beep beep beep beep, nothing more.

Muppet #2 (spoken): So when it says one, you go Beep
(and so on, repeating all the verses)

Muppet #2 (spoken): But what if it says three million, seven hundred forty-six thousand, nine hundred eighty-two?

Muppet #1 (spoken): That's easy, man.
(sung really fast): Then I go Beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep-
(into still more incomprehension, and screen fills up with still more circles. I think this is one of those places where they're different sizes and colors. I'm not sure what lines come next, if any. Then, at the end:)

Both: Beep beep beep beep, beep beep beep!