It's a friday night in bryan texas
And the main act hasn't shown
And you're stood outside the stage door waiting
As if you didn't know
As if any moment now
Your messiah will arrive
In that piece of junk pick up truck
That he always drives
First you call his manager and he says
"don't you know I quit
I got tired of tying his shoe laces
And getting him to gigs
You love his stories
And they are beautifully told
I don't know if it's me or him
Or his routine that got old"
Next you try his wife and she's says
He's not here
You know what he's like
For days he'll disappear
It doesn't matter if he shows or if he don't
Either way you will forgive him
Though now you say you won't
On a Friday night in Bryan Texas
When the main act hasn't shown..."
Yes he lets you down
But you're never disappointed
You're a gambler he's a slot machine
You'll keep putting in the quarters
On the promise that he'll pay you back
In song
Then you get the bright idea
Of calling his psychiatrist
She says "you just missed him
He was sat here in my office
Couldn't tell you where he is now
Except where he shouldn't be
But you don't need me to tell you that
You don't need to hear that from me"
So finally as a last resort
You reach jerry from the band
You say "Jerry, you should be here in Bryan
Playing with the man"
He says "i don't know nothing 'bout no gig
Sure is news to me
The man's power of communication
Is not what it used to be"
So it's Friday night in Bryan Texas
And the main act hasn't shown...