Phillip My Dear Lyrics

Phillip, my dear, last night I thought was you in here
Where did you go? Working for good old England,
Missing out all the action. My dear, do you know
There was a man in my bedroom wearing your shoe,
Trying on the royal costume, dipping in the royal perfume
I telling you true.
There was a man in my bedroom
Anxious for a rendezvous and I thought it was you.

He big just like you but younger
He thick just like you but stronger
He lingay like you but harder
He laylay like you but badder
A man in my bedroom
He came on the bed, doudou, and I took him for you.

The palace guards were playing hopscotch in the yard
Abandon the throne. Being with this perfect stranger
The jewel was in danger for I was alone
With a man in my bedroom loaded with brew
Yes, this malodorous urchin on top of my bed was perching like a cockatoo
A man in my bedroom
Sorry, dear, I misconstrued when I took him for you.

He big just like you but younger
He thick just like you but stronger
He lingay like you but harder
He laylay like you but badder
A man in my bedroom
He came on the bed, doudou, and I took him for you.

In Buckingham, no one respond to the alarm
So this plunderer displayed inside my boudoir
A tool made for agriculture. I stood there in awe
With a man in my bedroom, seven feet or more
He told me, "Come hither and foil." and all my good linen he soil
He was so obscene!
There was a man in my bedroom, so nasty and mean,
Singing to me, "God go save the queen!"

He big just like you but younger
He thick just like you but stronger
He lingay like you but harder
He laylay like you but badder
A man in my bedroom
He came on the bed, doudou, and I took him for you.

Evidently I've suffered great indignity from this commoner
Instead of being free in London
He should be put in a dungeon under the Tower
There was a man in my bedroom enjoying the view
This vicious, immoral scoundrel,
Son of a common mongrel, scared me through and through
There was a man in my bedroom
Your input was overdue and I thought it was you.

He big just like you but younger
He thick just like you but stronger
He lingay like you but harder
He laylay like you but badder
There was a man in my bedroom
He came on the bed, doudou, and I took him for you.