Dear Abby Lyrics

Dear Abby,
Got a problem. I'm a decent, underpaid, hardworking county coroner. It's
Important that my family eat meat at least three times a week. But we just
Can't afford to with the prices the way they are. so I bring home some
Choice cuts from my autopsy subjects. Just mix in the Tuna Helper...and
Ta-da!

The whole family thinks my new meals are delicious. They ask me what's
My secret. Abby, I think they're getting suspicious. My smart-ass
8-year-old keeps asking, "Where's all the meat? The red dye #2 kind that's
Kept in the fridge."

If they find out the truth I don't think they'll understand. Abby, what
Do I tell my family?

DEAR REAGANOMICS VICTIM: Consult your clergyman. Make sure the body's
Blessed and everything should be just fine.